The Joy of Being a Complete Fake, Completely in the Dark, Not Knowing Anything!

The fact is that’s an experience.Period. Saying it’s a total dependence on God, will have you nodding your head,yes,yes. But to be completely bereft of an answer, unable to deal with anything that is going on around you, yet being strangely at peace is something else.

For me it is the discipline of the Mind training of A Course In Miracles. Each moment I think something is going on here. Each moment I think someone else is actually talking to me. Each moment I forget my Source. And what happens for me is not feeling guilty that I fucked up again but a relief that I remembered. I don’t know anything and I am a complete fake.

Jesus is here with me now and He is happy that I can offer you the light of my total in-ability to make sense of ANYTHING happening in this world. This world, you call space and time,is without any meaning AT ALL and is totally unreal.You may argue that “I have given everything I see all the meaning it has for me” and that is true but the me you are talking about is not real in any regard. For me it’s in the recognition is where it disappears…again.

I can’t really tell you how happy I am that myself is nothing yet my Self is ALL. There is no choice. You can struggle against it, you can accept it, you can give up, you can go back to sleep for another million years. YOU ARE AS GOD CREATED YOU, of that there is no choice.

Thank God!